Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Week 6, the light at the end of the tunnel

Last week was the best one yet, for the most part.  I got a red blood cell transfusion on Monday, my first in 9-10 days and I usually get one or two a week.  So that was good that these transfusions are stretching out because they take 4-5 hours to do. 
Then my platelet count broke the 90,000 barrier where I had been stuck and hit 124,000.  I don't know what the hell 124,000 means except for the fact that I know that my threshold is 70,000.  When I hit 70,000 or below it's transfusion time.  You reading this, your platelet count is somewhere in the 10,000 range.  They keep me so HIGH because of the blood thinners I'm on.  Anyway I usually loose about 30-40,000 platelets a night so that's why I get the platelet transfusion 6-7 times a week. 
Last week I was stoked cause I only needed 4 transfusions.  Well this week with that 124,000 all time high, it held for the most part all week.  I had platelets on Tuesday and today's Tuesday and I haven't laid down since last Tuesday for platelets.  7 days without an infusion.  My shit was going down 2,000-5,000 a night.  Actually I don't have to go into SCCA today as they gave me the "day off!"
In Monday meeting I met my new Doctor, Rainer Storb.  Transplant Dr.s rotate thru SCCA to the hospital to research every month, so out went mellow cat Dr. George Georges, who was awesome by the way, in came Rainer Storb who I hi 5'd instantly.  We also had or PA (physicians assistant) Christine rotate out and I got back Gail who was my PA in the hospital for my chemo treatments.  We looked at each other and there was a hug right away. 

What a buck fifty four looks like...the walking dead.
 Clinic meeting was good.  My weight at last Mondays meeting was an all time low of 154lbs, which was down 10 pounds in 10 days, and my nutritionist said that if I didn't focus on adding 1,000 calories to my daily intake that they were gonna stick a feeding tube down my nose.  I showed up this week at a blistering 161lbs (with a battery charger, phone and a couple things in my pockets).  Goal for next week is 165lbs, no rocks in the pocket.  It's a eating week.

 Hoping to get back to this next year a svelte two bills and change, beer and all.  I'm 4 months sober and in discussing the future of my sobriety with a 5 year sober friend, he suggested that being sober sucks and I should drink beer again when I'm allowed.  Good advice I thought.
 Cindy my head nurse said that I will probably be with this yellow team another month or so before I get released back to my regular Dr., who is Dr. Becker.  In order to be released to her team, I need to be only going to the clinic once or twice a week maximum, so that's what we are gonna work on the next month.  Cutting my visits down going to the clinic, spreading out my transfusions and starting to get my life back.   I asked when I could stop wearing the official cancer persons outfit of sweatpants, beanie, Patagonia top and slippers.  They didn't understand which blew me away.  "What do you mean, that's the official cancer outfit, we see people in normal clothing all the time."  Like hell you do, follow me into the meeting room, I'll pick out every cancer patient in here based on their outfits.  We laughed and I think it's about time that I put on a pair of jeans for the first time since September 24th, the day before I went into the hospital.
After the Dr.s left, Cindy told us that she was leaving for vacation on Friday, taking a month off and going to Germany with her daughter.  Lisa and I were kinda shocked at first thinking you can't leave us, who will keep us in line, but then realized that the leash is really getting let out a little.  New docs, new nurse, new hospital schedule and a new life.  Cindy said that what we just went thru and are still going thru are the toughest things we'll ever go thru in our life, but it's worth it because if we didn't do it I would be dead in 3-5 years.  Pretty fucking real to hear that.  Buts its true, I don't think that this was the most painful thing I've ever been thru, but it certainly is the longest journey (there I said it, fuck you JOURNEY) we've ever been on.  So many shitty, uncomfortable, mind fucking, things that both Lisa and I had to go thru.  On top of that, you think about what Lisa has had to deal with this whole time.  Not any of the uncomfortableness, pain or medications for the cancer, but having to be my daily driver, food maker, pill reminder, shot giver, clothes cleaner, shower scrubber as well as still doing everything for the kids and trying to keep them as normal as possible.  All while getting really nothing in return.  Because the reality is, it's been all about me.  Selfish as that sounds,  I guess it needs to be that way but I think I rather be the person going thru what I just went thru than do what she has had to do since I broke my stupid ass elbow on May 30th, and that is to care for a grumpy ass old man and two teenage boys that are as active as ours. 
I'm glad 2015 is coming to a close,  cause as a glass is half full type of dude, the only thing I can say about 2015 is fuck you and good riddence.  It will cleary go down as the worst God damn year in my and probably Lisa's life. 
 I got some making up to do in 2016, and I'm looking forward to it.


  1. here's to 2016 and the new you! can't wait to have a cold beer with you again!!!

  2. Love that fam pic, that's the best! No more skinny Yo! Great update, keep charging, love yousss :)