Tuesday, October 13, 2015

The good times are killing me

Day 19 in this joint and day 10 post transplant.  When I got here I pulled out the calender and told the Doc that I like to know the ending of movie before I watch it, so tell me when the shit days are gonna be.  "October 4th - 14th your gonna be deep in it."  And the countdown was on.
Friday the 9th hit and the Mucasitis was only in my butt hole.  Then Saturday my inside of my mouth started to turn white. Taking my 15 pills in the morning was taking me almost 2 hours to choke down.  Eating was fucked.  Pudding and Jello were not my friends.
Sunday proved that it was not a "fun day." But Monday was a game changer.  They pulled me off food, and now I have a bag of nutrition dripping into me.  All my pills go in thru a drip.  They gave me a mouth numbing cream similar to the Bob's Butt Numbing Creme that I have been using to put of the flames on my ring of fire.  We hooked up one of those dentist spit suction devices so when my mouths full of thick mucus flem, I can just suck it out.  Sleeping pills only come in a pill form, so they hit me with 50mg of Benadryl and it was lights out.  And the special reach around of all this goodness was a morphine drip.  Every 6 minutes I'm allowed to press the button and give myself 1mg of morphine.   That would be 10 an hour, if I so chose too.  Excuse me, I need to push a button.  On top of all of that, the little hair I do have is falling out.  I go take a leak and look down, it reminds me of when I was 12.  I scratch my head, there's a smooth shiny spot amongst the stubble. 
But the cherry on top to all of this, was Leslie agreed to stay out here another week to help the kids, Lisa and myself out with all of this.
Now I know this all reads like every things great, but it sucks right now.  This is the crap time.  I've got lots of band aids for wounds that need stitches.  But so far it's keeping it all together.
Happy birthdays to two awesome humans, Benny and Emmet.  For your presents, I'm gonna push the button 10 times this hour.  Your welcome.

WeGnar, mid win whats up Facetime this Saturday.
For the first time I got stopped on my route last night.  "John, you're not allowed to leave the floor."  We'll see about that.
See all that whiteness?  That's not cocaine, that's pain.
My Wizard Stick is growing.
This is what I'm eating these days.
Say hello to my friend Morty.
Spit suction receptor thing.  Gonna save it as a souvenir. 
Mouth rinse, mouth numbing and lip protection every 30 minutes or so.


  1. you are a tough fucker johan. thanks for sharing this with us.

  2. Dude you're crushin it! Sorry that both your butt hole and pie hole are broken but I'm stoked your typing fingers and morphine thumb are still functioning. Love ya bud,

  3. Yo! you got this, love you buddy! c